


New Years

by CrimeAlley1048



Category: Batfamily - Fandom, Batman (Comics), batfam - Fandom
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-03
Updated: 2020-02-03
Packaged: 2021-02-28 06:42:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 555
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22539538
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CrimeAlley1048/pseuds/CrimeAlley1048
Summary: Let's make some New Years Resolutions huh
Relationships: whole dang family in here
Comments: 2
Kudos: 71





	New Years

“That’s the objective,” said Bruce, when he finished outlining the situation. “Any suggestions?”

Dick shrugged from his seat on the couch. “Seems straightforward. Me and—” He glanced around the room, apparently selecting a sibling. “—Tim? Me and Tim can take it from here.”

“I would prefer to remain on point.”

“In control,” Jason corrected. “You want control.”

“I can give up control.”

“Give it up for New Years,” Dick suggested.

“Give up for New Years,” said Tim, to the room at large. “Just in general.”

“Way ahead of you.” Dick reached towards Tim’s chair for a high five, but Cass, perched on the arm of that chair, slapped the hand away.

“No,” she said.

“No,” Bruce repeated. “Any other suggestions?”

“Give up talking,” said Jason. “I’m tired of hearing it.”

Bruce ran a hand through his own hair. If he didn’t get them back on topic in the next few seconds, they would never get there. “Suggestions about the _mission,_ ” he insisted.

“You’re talking. We discussed this. Anyone else?”

“Give up borrowing my scarves,” said Dick, “and not giving them back.”

“Grounding me,” chimed in Damian, from his corner.

“Leaving dishes in the microwave,” said Duke, shaking his head. “That’s gross.”

“Leaving dishes anywhere.” Alfred set aside his broom and crossed his arms. “You are all adults. Pick away your own dishes.”

The lot of them shared a laugh, then went right back to business.

“Lying?” asked Tim. “Can we do lying?”

“Oh good,” Dick sighed. “We got there.”

“Stealing my oatmeal cream pies!” Duke jumped in. “I know it’s you.”

Tim put up a hand. “That’s me, actually.”

“Oh. Never mind, then.”

“Me too,” said Cass.

Dick raised his hand as well. “Also me.”

“Is there anyone here that’s not stealing my oatmeal cream pies? Hands up.”

The hands went down. Bruce stood silently.

“I _knew_ it,” said Duke, glaring. “Give up your thieving ways.”

“Add something.” Tim waved a hand vaguely in Bruce’s direction. “Resolve to, I don’t know, read more fiction.”

“Resolve to work out more,” said Dick, in mock sincerity. “I just don’t think you exercise enough. I’ll buy you a gym membership.”

“Resolve to eat healthy by, wait for it—” Duke snapped his fingers. “—not eating my oatmeal cream pies.”

“I refuse,” said Dick. “I will not.”

“I’m giving up my interest in this conversation,” Jason said, standing up to leave. “Goodbye.”

“Good riddance.”

“Thanks.”

“No problem.”

“Meditate,” Cass put in.

“Organize,” said Damian, smirking. “This home is unstructured. We need more spreadsheets.”

“Good one.” Dick reached out for another high five, this time in Damian’s direction. His hand didn’t stretch far enough, so he put it down again, shrugging. Damian did not move through the process, but he did smile.

“Thank you.”

“Of course.”

“Mission,” Bruce reminded them. “This is a mission.”

Jason reappeared in the doorway. “This is a shitshow,” he said. “Okay, I’m done. Goodbye, and don’t call me again.”

“I’ll call you whatever I want,” Tim muttered. “the word ‘asshole’ comes to mind.”

“Hilarious.”

“I’m here all day.”

“At this rate, yeah.”

“Weren’t you leaving?”

“Yes.” Jason disappeared again. Bruce heard his footsteps retreat down the hallway.

He tried again, one more time. “Does anyone,” he said slowly, “have a plan for this operation.”

“No,” Dick said, grinning. “Can we go back to the resolution thing?”


End file.
